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Post by CrowJam on Jun 30, 2018 0:07:27 GMT
RORB QUEST Your name is Rorb, you are a Lalorb. And my God are you angry!What will you do? |
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Post by that anon on Jun 30, 2018 2:42:51 GMT
> Rorb: Use saw to carve all the fruits into the same shape as your head.
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Post by Rachel on Jun 30, 2018 4:04:07 GMT
Saw table in half
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Post by CrowJam on Jun 30, 2018 4:51:56 GMT
> Rorb: Use saw to carve all the fruits into the same shape as your head.   You dump the fruit on the table in the crummiest way you can manage and gladly prepare for a little arts & crafts project. Unfortunately however, on top of you having no artistic ability whatsoever, it turns out that your saw is an utter piece of shit. While you manage to carve up the lemon and pear fairly easily, you end up squishing the strawberry and banana pretty badly. The apple ends up flying off the table when you try to cut it and you have no idea where in the heck the grapefruit went. The grapes and orange are mostly round already so you leave them be for the most part, only removing the individual grapes from the vine.
 Also it appears that the fruits are actually sentient and you have put them in a great amount of pain. What a bitch.
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Post by CrowJam on Jun 30, 2018 19:39:28 GMT
 Gladly The amount of senseless destruction you have wrought has caused your ANGER gauge to decrease. Your RORBNESS and SALTY GOOD SATISFACTION gauges remain unaltered. |
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Post by CrowJam on Jul 1, 2018 4:18:35 GMT
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Post by CrowJam on Jul 1, 2018 20:47:33 GMT
>Rorb: Put the bowl on your head  The contours of the bowl align perfectly to the shape of your head. You are now invincible against any and all attacks! Your DEFENSE increases by 6! Your VISIBILITY lowers by 4! Your LOOKING LIKE A FUCKING IDIOT increases by 52! |
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Post by CrowJam on Jul 3, 2018 0:06:03 GMT
AN: In order to keep Rorb Quest on a more consistent update schedule I will now be implementing my own commands if I do not receive any after a certain amount of time.
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Post by CrowJam on Jul 3, 2018 1:37:38 GMT
Rorb: Realize the bowl is now stuck on your head Fuck.Rorb: Examine piece of paper  I’m sorry if it somehow wasn’t already evident, but in your current state you can’t examine shit. |
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♡ alvin ♡
Greentike
Posts: 2
Pronouns: they/them/theirs
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Post by ♡ alvin ♡ on Jul 3, 2018 1:55:34 GMT
Haphazardly saw the bowl off your head
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Post by CrowJam on Jul 3, 2018 19:13:48 GMT
Haphazardly saw the bowl off your head  While you are not able to remove the bowl in its entirety, through trial and error you at least manage to saw off a sizeable portion and regain your eyesight. Though this may have caused you to lose your invincibility, at least now you won’t be falling all over yourself like a tool.
 In a flash of inspiration, you also decide to dip the pieces of cut off bowl in banana guts and glue them to the sides of your new helmet. You now look cool as all heck. |
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Post by CrowJam on Jul 4, 2018 16:34:49 GMT
Rorb: Examine piece of paper with newly regained eyesight.
The “piece of paper” seems to be nothing more than a simple birthday card with an illustration of a slice of cake on it. Despite its innocuous appearance however, you suddenly sense an immense evil aura emanating from it. You decide to save opening it for a later time.
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Post by CrowJam on Jul 6, 2018 4:53:46 GMT
Place birthday card in inventory:
Your inventory now consists of the following:
1x Magnetic Wodka
1x Birthday Card
1x Cool Bowl/Helmet (equip)
1x Orange Creamsicle Pajamas (equip)
1x Pair of Blueberry Booties (equip)
1x Saw (Weaponized)
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♡ alvin ♡
Greentike
Posts: 2
Pronouns: they/them/theirs
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Post by ♡ alvin ♡ on Jul 6, 2018 6:36:00 GMT
Activate the Wodka
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Rorb: Use banana guts as war p
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Post by Rorb: Use banana guts as war p on Jul 7, 2018 2:33:37 GMT
Apply the banana to your face to make you look more threatening
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Post by that anon on Jul 7, 2018 4:57:38 GMT
Rorb: Fly. You’ve got the tiger, haven’t you? For proof, show us the tiger’s carcass.
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Post by CrowJam on Jul 7, 2018 6:10:52 GMT
Ah Magnetic Wodka, the one true friend you have left in this world. As you prepare to commence the ritual that will unleash the alcohol’s vast power, you make a silent vow to yourself that you will only use it in the name of all that is good and holy!
 You proceed to dump the liquor all over yourself like a fucking dumbass, completing the ceremony and turning you into the being know as Magnetic Rorb! On top of making yourself smell like a homeless bum, you have also become magnetically polarized, allowing you to attract certain metallic objects from great distances away!
P.S. You should probably stay away from open flames for a certain amount of time as well. |
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Post by badIdea on Jul 7, 2018 11:17:59 GMT
Create fire for warmth.
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Post by badIdea on Jul 7, 2018 11:35:39 GMT
also scream because you just poured alcohol into an open cut. Dumb broad.
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Post by CrowJam on Jul 7, 2018 21:12:07 GMT
AN: The page I just posted is now deleted and retconned due to not being of high enough quality. In other news Rorb Quest is now on MSPFA if you want to read it there! |
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Post by CrowJam on Jul 8, 2018 18:38:48 GMT
Apply the banana to your face to make you look more threatening For some reason you suddenly decide to rub the banana carcass all over your face, covering it with a mix of its juices, the left over Wodka liquid, and the blood from your wound.
You now look like…
My God.
YOU NOW LOOK LIKE…
 You decide you now look like the tiger, it is you.
 Yeah no, in actuality you decide you look pretty fucking awful and decide to wipe the mixture off your face before you feel any more embarrassment, returning your visage to its former Rorbness glory in the process.
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Post by CrowJam on Jul 10, 2018 20:12:59 GMT
Rorb: Fly. You’ve got the tiger, haven’t you? For proof, show us the tiger’s carcass.  Due to a very large amount of plot bullshit the author doesn’t want to come up with, you have unfortunately lost the ability to fly.
You do however deign to flashback to when you ate the tiger carcass in order to gain its strength. |
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Post by CrowJam on Jul 11, 2018 3:10:54 GMT
 Your rage is all you need to stay warm at night! The sheer stupidity of this suggestion has caused your Anger meter to increase! |
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Post by CrowJam on Jul 11, 2018 3:11:44 GMT
also scream because you just poured alcohol into an open cut. Dumb broad.  Didn’t you see the shitty animation?!? Those were obviously screams of pain! |
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Post by CrowJam on Jul 12, 2018 3:34:48 GMT
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