tronn
Rungjumpin' Ragamuffin
Posts: 287
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Post by tronn on Oct 11, 2016 20:24:23 GMT
>See if your strife specibus accepts a polished metal tray as a mirror
Aww, the mirgonsprite is cute!
...and a bit too cheery about killing imps.
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dldracorex
Jade Sylph
Posts: 1,343
Pronouns: he/him/his
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Post by dldracorex on Oct 11, 2016 21:32:02 GMT
Aww, the mirgonsprite is cute! I know, right? ...and a bit too cheery about killing imps. I know, right? |
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Post by Zerio on Oct 12, 2016 8:13:12 GMT
As a note, I like how your bringing up the whole "killing things is considered wrong on most cultures" thing. Not enough SBURB fics acknowledge it. Thanks, I'm going for a more emotionally realistic introduction to the whole world of Sverb, heh. >See if your strife specibus accepts a polished metal tray as a mirror Aww, the mirgonsprite is cute! ...and a bit too cheery about killing imps. Glad to hear you like them! They are a bit unsettlingly happy, aha. Anyway, the next update might take a bit since it's sorta big and I also want to put some work into my other adventures. In the meantime, I redesigned some of the introduced characters to make them stand out from each other a bit more; I'll probably be retconning these designs into earlier pages over time. Thoughts?  |
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dldracorex
Jade Sylph
Posts: 1,343
Pronouns: he/him/his
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Post by dldracorex on Oct 12, 2016 8:25:19 GMT
As a note, I like how your bringing up the whole "killing things is considered wrong on most cultures" thing. Not enough SBURB fics acknowledge it. Thanks, I'm going for a more emotionally realistic introduction to the whole world of Sverb, heh. >See if your strife specibus accepts a polished metal tray as a mirror Aww, the mirgonsprite is cute! ...and a bit too cheery about killing imps. Glad to hear you like them! They are a bit unsettlingly happy, aha. Anyway, the next update might take a bit since it's sorta big and I also want to put some work into my other adventures. In the meantime, I redesigned some of the introduced characters to make them stand out from each other a bit more; I'll probably be retconning these designs into earlier pages over time. Thoughts? The new ones feel more ....... vibrant? I like them. |
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tronn
Rungjumpin' Ragamuffin
Posts: 287
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Post by tronn on Oct 12, 2016 10:27:42 GMT
I like what you're doing with hair (Zariyah's is descending, Kristan's ascending, Rennard's in reverse), but you should vary their ears more. Now they look weird because they're identical, try having them be droopy or perky for instance.
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Post by Zerio on Oct 12, 2016 18:46:05 GMT
Thanks. The whole up/down/back thing was the idea from the start, but I didn't exactly execute it very well - they all looked very similar, so I figured I'd exaggerate it more. I'll see what I can do with the ears, but if I change them I probably won't vary them /too/ much; one of the unique attributes of Cheral/moon adlets in general is the perked up ears.
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dldracorex
Jade Sylph
Posts: 1,343
Pronouns: he/him/his
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Post by dldracorex on Oct 12, 2016 19:55:26 GMT
Thanks. The whole up/down/back thing was the idea from the start, but I didn't exactly execute it very well - they all looked very similar, so I figured I'd exaggerate it more. I'll see what I can do with the ears, but if I change them I probably won't vary them /too/ much; one of the unique attributes of Cheral/moon adlets in general is the perked up ears. Maybe just make the fur fringes that hang down from their ears differ somewhat? |
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Post by Zerio on Oct 22, 2016 8:43:40 GMT
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Post by gordian12 on Oct 22, 2016 15:47:13 GMT
Well you just got at least one new reader. Great adventure so far, I especially appreciate the comedic timing and the writing as well.
>Everyone: Marvel at the fact that the blue book has mysteriously reappeared.
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Post by dediles on Oct 22, 2016 17:38:50 GMT
>Rennard: stop being a weenie and just jump out your window. it's a dream so that's either the fastest way to wake up or you get to fly get the hell out of dodge.
>Rennard: take of that ridiculous hat.
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Post by Piono on Oct 22, 2016 18:35:00 GMT
Aww... wonderful heart warming moment.
This is getting really good.
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dldracorex
Jade Sylph
Posts: 1,343
Pronouns: he/him/his
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Post by dldracorex on Oct 22, 2016 19:30:51 GMT
> Rennard: Just, go back to sleep.
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tronn
Rungjumpin' Ragamuffin
Posts: 287
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Post by tronn on Oct 22, 2016 19:56:25 GMT
>Rennard: Look out of the window. Is that weird thing closer than before?
Aww, what a sweet moment!
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dldracorex
Jade Sylph
Posts: 1,343
Pronouns: he/him/his
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Post by dldracorex on Oct 24, 2016 20:54:45 GMT
> Rennard: Jump out the WINDOW.
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Post by Zerio on Oct 30, 2016 3:53:25 GMT
 
> Rennard: Just go back to sleep. (21 pages.) Thanks for the positive comments! In addition to today's update I have also added a title page and map to the adventure. Also since someone requested it elsewhere, here's an attempt at a fan adlet base, in case anyone here is interested. |
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Post by dediles on Oct 30, 2016 16:47:52 GMT
>Rennard: now that you're closer to the ground take another look at the people.
>Rennard: Fly you fool!
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dldracorex
Jade Sylph
Posts: 1,343
Pronouns: he/him/his
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Post by dldracorex on Oct 31, 2016 0:21:16 GMT
> Rennard: Descend.
> Rennard: Get inside, they can not see you inside.
> Rennard: Get as far from those creatures as you can.
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tronn
Rungjumpin' Ragamuffin
Posts: 287
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Post by tronn on Nov 1, 2016 17:42:12 GMT
>Well this hasn't happened before, better explore while you can. Maybe you'll find another dreamer?
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Post by Piono on Nov 1, 2016 18:19:36 GMT
Rennard: Discover "friends"
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dldracorex
Jade Sylph
Posts: 1,343
Pronouns: he/him/his
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Post by dldracorex on Nov 1, 2016 18:28:30 GMT
> Rennard: Check for other towers.
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Post by dediles on Nov 2, 2016 3:52:55 GMT
>Well this hasn't happened before, better explore while you can. Maybe you'll find another dreamer? >that's silly, this is your dream. next thing you know you'll think that the universe is a frog. |
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dldracorex
Jade Sylph
Posts: 1,343
Pronouns: he/him/his
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Post by dldracorex on Nov 3, 2016 16:25:42 GMT
> Rennard: Grab a newspaper.
> Rennard: Talk to someone.
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Post by Zerio on Nov 10, 2016 9:35:03 GMT
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tronn
Rungjumpin' Ragamuffin
Posts: 287
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Post by tronn on Nov 10, 2016 17:13:25 GMT
>Rennard: Consider for a moment that being scared by everything might mean that you're just a big baby. Get a grip of yourself!
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dldracorex
Jade Sylph
Posts: 1,343
Pronouns: he/him/his
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Post by dldracorex on Nov 10, 2016 17:25:33 GMT
> Rennard: Investigate.
> Rennard: Descend.
> Rennard: Try to find someone to talk to.
> Rennard: Clearly, this is a lucid dream. Grow some extra arms or something.
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