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Post by The Paradoxical Insurgent on Apr 21, 2016 1:17:31 GMT
>Punch the MEDIUM ENEMY CRAB to establish dominance.
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Post by Wessolf27 on Apr 21, 2016 10:58:09 GMT
>Prepare for a Crustacean Confrontacean.
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Post by BB on Apr 21, 2016 15:05:32 GMT
>Drop the coconut on it and crush it into a crabcake > COCONUT TECH LV1: PIÑA COLLIDE-A
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quixoticTokki
Void
baby gangsta
Posts: 702
Pronouns: she/her/hers
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Post by quixoticTokki on Apr 21, 2016 17:39:00 GMT
> This is not the time for war, but the time for DIPLOMACY!
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Post by sirblizz98 on Apr 23, 2016 7:11:56 GMT
>What the heck happened to all the other crabs?Good Question, you guess they aall vamoosed like a bunch o flily livered sea-chickens. The Cowards. >Wield yon knife, stab yon crabYou wield your knife, battle is formally joined, Fast paced rock music blairs in the distance as the waltz of combat is reduced to it's fundamentals expressed in the cold emotionless spectrum of binary numerology. Victory and defeat determined by the roll of a die and the whim of an uncaring god. What a thrill>>Anyway, you decide to stab the MEDIUM ENEMY CRAB Dealing a respectable blow to your crustacean adversary. >>The MEDIUM ENEMY CRAB offers a vicious retort to your position. >>Oh but PINKY ain't about to let such aggreviences slide unanswered. >>GREEN uses LVL 1 SCUTTLETECH : SOOTHING SCOOTLE, which restores a bit of your CHUTZPAH and makes ya' feel alright. >>It suddenly starts raining, were you not so absorbed in the THRILLING VENUE OF RPG COMBAT you might give a shit, but alas, you're overly distracted by this crab... >Punch the MEDIUM ENEMY CRAB to establish dominance.You SOCK IT TO EM, showing this Red BUSTER just who's the beans of this operation, the boss you see, and that would be you. >>You're attempt to assert your authority appears to have backfired, and this blaggart appears rather STEAMED. >>He Charges at ya with vim and vinegar, but GREEN intercepts the Blow, what a Hero, but it looks like they're KO'D. Their Sacrifice Shall not be in vain! >Drop the coconut on it and crush it into a crabcakeYou take the WEIRD COCONUT from your pack, you're gonna finish this in an unecessarily spectacular manner. >>>>Drawing upon the many long, hot, homerotic days of vollyballing with the BOYS , you put your strength into this killer spike. >COCONUT TECH LV1: PIÑA COLLIDE-AGet Dunked on!>>The MEDIUM ENEMY CRAB is slain. >Level Up?You then unexpectedly LEVEL UP, unexpected because you didn't actually know that was a thing you could do, apparantly this world is RPGS and NUMBERS all the way down, oh well, might as well celebrate human advancement being simplified into a series of MATHEMAGICAL NUMERICALS. ALEX PORTER IS NOW LEVEL 2 CHUTZPAH INCREASES TO 30 PUNCH INCREASES TO 25 LIQUIDITY FACTOR INCREASES TO 1.5 SCHMALTZ INCREASES TO 11 ALEX HAS GAINED A FAMILIARTY WITH COCONUTS ALEX HAS GAINED A FAMILIARTY WITH CRABS and can now use LVL 1 ANIMAL COMMUNION - CRAB DIPLOMANCY PINKIE IS NOW LEVEL 3 CRABITUDE INCREASES TO 101 CHUTZPAH INCREASES TO 55 CLAMP INCREASES TO 35 GREEN IS NOW LEVEL 2 CRABITUDE DECREASES TO 11 CHUTZPAH INCREASES 15.5 CLAMP INCREASES TO 28
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Post by Neptz on Apr 23, 2016 12:35:29 GMT
>Great, now get somewhere safe to avoid exposure!
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Post by badatnames on Apr 23, 2016 14:52:53 GMT
>Woo! Advancing by killing innocent animals that probably could've fled from!
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Post by The Paradoxical Insurgent on Apr 23, 2016 15:31:35 GMT
>Time to feast on your enemy's remains. Once you find some shelter of course.
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Post by typeandkey on Apr 23, 2016 16:47:16 GMT
>Celebrate this victory. High fives all around.
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Post by crossedcaravan on Apr 24, 2016 18:48:59 GMT
> Alex: Use Crab Diplomacy with Pinkie. Inquire about gender.
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Post by sirblizz98 on Apr 25, 2016 1:33:02 GMT
>Celebrate this victory. High fives all around.You start handing out CELABRATORY HIGH FIVES like they were cheap cigarillos, not a single soul shall escape your celabratory gesture, all two of them. Yes Even you GREEN. >Woo! Advancing by killing innocent animals that probably could've fled from!LISTEN. It attacked you... WOULD'VE attacked you. You're quite confident. After all it was a MEDIUM ENEMY CRAB not a MEDIUM FRIEND CRAB right... also it probably stole your box, and then... came back for some reason? Shut up. >Claim the claws of your adversary as trophies and prepare his legs for a future meal.Right, all shall know of your victory of this DEFINITELY HOSTILE Crustacean entity. It was definitely a threat, look at what it did to GREEN, and all you did was poke it's eye out. >Tend to your fallen companion first and foremost!Right-Right-Right... Oh dear, Green is in a bad way for sure... but thankfully they're just KO'D, as long as you get them out of this spontanious storm, somewhere safe, yeah they should be fine. >>Speaking of, what's the deal, it was clear skies literally seconds ago, is this one of those weird TROPICAL STORMS you've heard about, is this CLIMATE CHANGE, is this the wrath of AL GORE come to smite the non-believers! >Great, now get somewhere safe to avoid exposure!Best not to dwell on it for too much, you're getting drenched, and the last thing you need on an island thats surely full of CERTAINLY HOSTILE Crustaceans is a cold, or worse, the deadly INFLUENZA. Thankfully you know exactly where to go. >>>>>>You are now in the MYSTERY CAVE that was previously hidden behind the GHOST WALL, and... well you were honestly expecting something more impressive, given that somebody hid it behind a GHOST WALL.
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Post by The Paradoxical Insurgent on Apr 25, 2016 1:41:06 GMT
>Pinky's got a present for you! But you got bigger fish to fry. Inspect new shelter.
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sporkaganza
You are the Star
Posts: 221
Pronouns: he/him/his
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Post by sporkaganza on Apr 25, 2016 1:49:42 GMT
> Look at the neat drawing of the hard hat guy!
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Post by typeandkey on Apr 25, 2016 16:57:17 GMT
>Immediately sit down and begin watching television. Your life picks up where it left off before you were stranded.
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toto
Bravesprout
Posts: 85
Pronouns: she/her/hers
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Post by toto on Apr 25, 2016 18:29:59 GMT
>Check out picture on the wall.
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Post by crossedcaravan on Apr 26, 2016 1:28:18 GMT
> Was that an army of lizards that you just passed by?
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Post by sirblizz98 on Apr 26, 2016 6:37:07 GMT
>Notice your glasses mysteriously vanished just before the fight with then ENEMY CRAB.Well, you put them in your pocket. You didn't want them to get broken in that fight. >Find a nice damp rock pool or something for GREENBACKS to convalesce in.Well you can't see anything as such so you're just gonna... oh hey. >>Its... INKY, if you recall correctly, you guess this is where they wandered off to. Uh, anyway, you're just gonna like, leave them somewhere relative safe while you deal this other business. >Whats that thing PINKY has?It looks like some kind of watch, wait a minute, is that- it is! >>It's a cWATCH, and not just any cWATCH, it's YOUR cWATCH. The Latest and greatest innovation in INVENTORY MANAGEMENT/SMARTPHONE TECHNOLOGY, from the lovely people at SEA-TEK, It's a portable mostly Hands free INVENTORY and VITAL STATISTIC tracking solution, It's also SMARTPHONE and provides you all the benefits therein, such as being a WATCH that allows you tell time! Wowee what an inovation. >>You Bring up your cFILE, ugh... that profile picture... and review your VITAL STATISTICS... yeah you don't really understand what most of these numbers mean, and in fact, you feel like it would be futile to speculate. Anyway though everything seems to be in order. >Insert LEAF into COMPUTERUngluing your eyes from your WATCH, you go over to this DEVICE, it kind looks like a weird TV and VCR honestly, more than a computer anyway. >>You stick the PALM FROND into the slot anyway... You're not entirely certain what you- >>Huh. >Immediately sit down and begin watching television.You Gaze Into the DEVICE, it has a certain strange attraction to you. Yet simultaneously you are repulsed, the color reminds you too much of your EX-GIRLFRIEND and Her big dumb glowing face looming obnoxiously outside your bedroom. Yeah you're done staring at this thing. >Look at the neat drawing of the hard hat guy!You look at the drawing, it is very neat, some might say even kinda cute. Look at that guy, in his little Hard-Hat, He probably works very HARD and very SAFELY. You kinda wish you had a Hard-Hat now. The Sign points out to you that you are in a CAVE, and rocks might fall from about onto your head, perhaps giving you a CONCUSSION. >Pick up the hard hat safety sign and wear it as head protection.Suddenly driven by PARANOIA about falling you try to pry the sign off the post to use a makeshift Helmet. Alas, it remains fastened sturdily to the post, a testament to the power of SAFETY this sign possesses, or perhaps the CHUTZPAH of the post.
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toto
Bravesprout
Posts: 85
Pronouns: she/her/hers
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Post by toto on Apr 26, 2016 11:13:40 GMT
>Inspect door on the other side.
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Post by Wessolf27 on Apr 26, 2016 11:40:14 GMT
Who's JUNO?
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Post by typeandkey on Apr 26, 2016 22:38:18 GMT
>Help tend to your fallen comrade and check on how Green is doing.
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Post by Neptz on Apr 26, 2016 22:45:25 GMT
>Look around for a bed in case you're tired in the future.
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sporkaganza
You are the Star
Posts: 221
Pronouns: he/him/his
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Post by sporkaganza on Apr 27, 2016 2:56:09 GMT
Have one of the crabs stand on top of your head.
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quixoticTokki
Void
baby gangsta
Posts: 702
Pronouns: she/her/hers
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Post by quixoticTokki on Apr 27, 2016 3:42:57 GMT
> What's powering the lights and that machine? Follow the cords!
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Post by sirblizz98 on Apr 28, 2016 19:34:33 GMT
>Who's JUNO?That's a very interesting question because there's no singular answer because SHE is many things. She's a PHILANTHROPIST MULTI-BILLIONAIRE who makes more in a day than you've made you're entire career, The World's MOST ATTRACTIVE WOMEN, the Current face of leading Fashion Magazine FAXION, among other equally vaunted achievements. Oh, she's also you're EX-GIRLFRIEND. >Jump up and down on those planks in a contemplative fashion. They look nice and bouncy. Well it seems that appearances can be deceiving because these boards are stiff as... well... BOARDS, still though, activity relieves some of the stress of remembering your overbearing EX-GIRLFRIEND, so it is not all a waste you suppose. >Help tend to your fallen comrade and check on how Green is doing.You decide to see how GREENBACKS is doing, have you actually decided their name is GREENBACKS? You're not certain, you should probably get on that, anyway, you look over their condition, It appears unchanged, which is to say, slowly improving. >Create girlfriend using sticks, coconuts and palm frondsYou are suddenly overcome with thoughts of making a FAKE GIRLFRIEND out of stick and coconuts and suddenly also of MAIZEY, who the heck is MAIZEY, you think, you have no Idea who that is. That beside this whole Idea strikes you as silly, and slightly desperate. You dismiss this line of thinking post haste. >What's powering the lights and that machine? Follow the cords!Following the mess of cords leads you to the DOOR, the source of power for all these is behind the DOOR! >Open the door to the right with reckless abandonOH YES!!!! >>It appears to be some sort of combination LAB/BEDROOM. This place looks amazingly cramped and uncomfortable to live in, sorta like your first apartment, but worse because you can't imagine how anyone would keep this place clean... Uhh, anyway.
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Post by Neptz on Apr 28, 2016 20:04:23 GMT
>Look at adorable plushies.
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