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Post by 1337Walrus on Oct 13, 2016 7:34:32 GMT
> Yeah, that carpet looks like grass. Investigate.
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tofurkinator
Nipper Cadet
hello and thanks for all the fish
Posts: 72
Pronouns: they/them/theirs
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Post by tofurkinator on Oct 14, 2016 1:31:35 GMT
>Inspect grassy looking carpet. > Yeah, that carpet looks like grass. Investigate. You lie down to inspect the carpet more closely. It's the same carpet that's been in your room ever since you were little. At the edges and corners it joins with the same wallpaper that's been in your room ever since you were little in the same room that you've had since you were little. You begin to formulate a potentially plot-revealing comment involving everything on the island still being the same as when you were little, but the narrator shuts you down before you can give anything away. Of course, you just forget what you were going to say and obey the next command, though you don't know that that's what you are doing when you go out to the landing.Go downstairs to check mail You head down the stairs carefully, as you never know when someone else is in the house. You look out over the railing and-- --And oh great, it's your mom. AND your aunt, just to top things off. Well then, you'll just have to be extra careful heading down the stairs.OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE. There's absolutely no way your mom didn't hear that.ohcrapohcrapohcrapohcrap--"Roxy, honey, come downstairs and say hello to your aunt!" ((AN: This is all really weird, I know, but I promise this will all make sense later!!))
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Post by Sharkalien on Oct 14, 2016 3:01:09 GMT
>Literally say "Hello to your aunt!"
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tofurkinator
Nipper Cadet
hello and thanks for all the fish
Posts: 72
Pronouns: they/them/theirs
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Post by tofurkinator on Oct 15, 2016 1:58:35 GMT
>Literally say "Hello to your aunt!" Hello to your aunt, you shout from the landing. Stop being so sarcastic, your mother says. But mom! you say. I need to check the mail! You can check your mail after you've said a proper hello to your auntie Nepeta, she says. She's traveled such a long way to see you. C'mon! you groan. Get down here right now, young lady, or you can consider yourself grounded, says Mom. Hey, says your aunt. I brought over some cookies. You wish you could be someone else for a while. I heard that, says your mom. How does she even do that? I heard that too, she says, and it's none of your business. GROAN.
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Post by stormlordApathy on Oct 15, 2016 2:21:01 GMT
Roxy==> Be Jane
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NothingIsOkay75
Planet Healer
Homestuck 2? More like Homestuck POO amirite? Please bring back this forum
Posts: 324
Pronouns: he/him/his
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Post by NothingIsOkay75 on Oct 15, 2016 3:38:56 GMT
>Introduce your mother and aunt to the audience
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tofurkinator
Nipper Cadet
hello and thanks for all the fish
Posts: 72
Pronouns: they/them/theirs
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Post by tofurkinator on Oct 16, 2016 1:50:45 GMT
>Introduce your mother and aunt to the audience This is your MOTHER. She's the best! She's kind, and nice, and sweet, and creative--in fact, she gave up a promising career as an artist/singer/songwriter to come to the island and take care of you after your GRANDMOTHER fell ill and died. Why she couldn't have just brought you to the city and raised you there, you don't know, but you'd never dare question it--questioning your mother'll get you in TROUBLE. Isn't she just amazing?And this is your Aunt Nepeta! You've known her for, like, forever, and seeing as she's LITERALLY THE ONLY HUMAN BEING OUTSIDE YOUR MOTHER YOU'VE EVER MET FACE-TO-FACE, you tend to IDOLIZE HER a bit. You think she works for some baked goods company or something like that, you don't really pay attention to those types of things. She does, however, bring over the BEST cookies and cakes and you love love love her for it!!
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Post by Sharkalien on Oct 16, 2016 22:16:21 GMT
>Give a proper hello to your auntie Nepeta
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Post by TrickleJest on Oct 17, 2016 17:35:23 GMT
This is amazing!
ROXY ==> Be Mr. Slick
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RoyalADK
Greentike
Posts: 3
Pronouns: I'd rather not say
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Swapbent
Oct 17, 2016 21:43:18 GMT
via mobile
Post by RoyalADK on Oct 17, 2016 21:43:18 GMT
Roxy => Be a Dear and Give your aunt Nepeta a proper hello, please?
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tofurkinator
Nipper Cadet
hello and thanks for all the fish
Posts: 72
Pronouns: they/them/theirs
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Post by tofurkinator on Oct 18, 2016 23:27:18 GMT
>Give a proper hello to your auntie Nepeta Roxy => Be a Dear and Give your aunt Nepeta a proper hello, please? You're hugging her, aren't you? You're pretty sure that's an appropriate greeting for a close family friend. Or at least a polite enough greeting to keep your mother off your back for not obeying the laws of etiquette.This is amazing! ROXY ==> Be Mr. Slick ((Aaaa thank you so much!! I'm so glad you like it! ^^)) Mr. Slick is ON HIS BREAK, but if he was here, he'd most likely recommend you be someone else, for god's sake, hasn't he suffered enough already?, and also shout in your general direction instructions for you to go somewhere unmentionable and and engage in an activity that is quite decidedly physically impossible for anybody but the most limber and dedicated contortionist to perform. All things considered, it's probably best for you to avoid being him for the time being, or at least until he gets back from his "coffee" break.
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Post by Sharkalien on Oct 18, 2016 23:41:00 GMT
>Roxy: Cut a rug with a vicious Charleston maneuver
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NothingIsOkay75
Planet Healer
Homestuck 2? More like Homestuck POO amirite? Please bring back this forum
Posts: 324
Pronouns: he/him/his
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Post by NothingIsOkay75 on Oct 18, 2016 23:47:00 GMT
>Lass Scamper away! We have a mailbox to check!
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tofurkinator
Nipper Cadet
hello and thanks for all the fish
Posts: 72
Pronouns: they/them/theirs
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Post by tofurkinator on Oct 21, 2016 1:18:45 GMT
>Roxy: Cut a rug with a vicious Charleston maneuver You attempt to furiously perform the Charleston while hugging your aunt. The results are...less than expected, to say the least.
>Lass Scamper away! We have a mailbox to check! You successfully lass scamper away while Aunt Nepeta is confused! You make a break for the mailbox, and...And... ...and ITEM GET! You have obtained a COPY of SBURB BETA! Aw yeah!!!
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Post by Sharkalien on Oct 21, 2016 1:24:20 GMT
>Get the funk outta there!
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venchi
Rungjumpin' Ragamuffin
Posts: 283
Pronouns: he/him/his
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Post by venchi on Oct 21, 2016 14:37:57 GMT
Place the beta in your syladex
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Post by eerr on Oct 21, 2016 17:14:30 GMT
>Stick the beta in your headband.
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Gotta Go Slartibartfast
Guest
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Post by Gotta Go Slartibartfast on Oct 24, 2016 18:43:13 GMT
Tell Jane you HAVE the game
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tofurkinator
Nipper Cadet
hello and thanks for all the fish
Posts: 72
Pronouns: they/them/theirs
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Post by tofurkinator on Oct 26, 2016 22:25:18 GMT
Tell Jane you HAVE the game You take your phone out of the hidden pocket you sewed in your dress last time it went to the "cleaners" on the mainland (or at least that's what your mom's always told you about how your clothes stayed fresh) and swipe open your phone to tell your best friend that you've got the game.
GG: Janey, I got it! I got the disk! TG: haha YESSS TG: so TG: ... TG: ..... TG: ...... GG: Yes? TG: so r u gonna tell j or am i TG: its gonna haveta be one of us yknow GG: Tell him what? GG: That you ordered him a video game without his permission or knowledge and that you expect him to play it, despite never playing a video game before in his life? GG: Or that you've somehow managed to rope both me and Dirk into playing it as well? GG: Because, to be quite honest with you, no matter which confession you're referring to, that pleasure's all yours. GG: "Pleasure", of course, being used in the most sheerly sarcastic manner that can be conveyed over written text. TG: haha TG: see TG: this is why were friends TG: ill tell him k TG: yoyu just sit there and dont worry your pretty little ass about it one moment more TG: good? good.
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Post by Sharkalien on Oct 28, 2016 19:51:37 GMT
>Jane: Contact this Mr. J
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tofurkinator
Nipper Cadet
hello and thanks for all the fish
Posts: 72
Pronouns: they/them/theirs
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Post by tofurkinator on Oct 30, 2016 20:58:45 GMT
>Jane: Contact this Mr. J Somewhere, a young boy pauses in his studies and checks his phone. He groans when he sees the bright teal letters proclaiming that turntechGumshoe was pestering him. He presses return message.
TG: jakey... TG: answre me... TG: .you knw you wanna.. TT: Oh for heaven's sake. TT: What is it this time? TG: nothing.... TG: except.......... TG: I GOTCHA SOMETHING TT: OH COME ON, JANE! TT: THIS IS SIMPLY THE MOST SUPERCILIOUS THING I HAVE EVER HEARD IN MY LIFE! TT: Ahem. TT: Jane, shouldn't you have learned from last time you tried to order me one of your tenacious "surprises" that I do not, nor ever will, like various things being shipped to me in the mail from "friends" of mine that live across the globe? TT: Because I don't. TT: Want things ordered for me, that is. TG: "friends" TG: harsh, cowboy TG: and anyway TG: havent u gotten urslef like. TG: a dictionary? yet TG: because you really really should if you actualy think that thats what tenacious means TG: its laughable really TG: just a lil TG: honestly mostly laughable tho TG: look at me TG: laughin my ass off TG: laughable and 2 be frnkly honest......... TG: a lil bit sad TG: at ur manglin of the english language TT: Well, in that case, I'm laughing right there along with you. TT: Ha. TT: Fucking. TT: Ha. TT: Now, are you going to tell me whatever atrocity you've ordered me this time, or will I have to go and check? TG: pfft TG: go and check, big boy TG: go and check TT: ARGH. TT: Well, then, if you must insist on being this dadaist, I suppose I must. TT: You are such a quintuplet sometimes, honestly. TG: whatever ya say TG: NOW GO AND CHECK YOUR GODDAMNED MAIL ALREADY
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Post by stormlordApathy on Oct 30, 2016 21:30:14 GMT
Jake==> Google "tenacious"
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NothingIsOkay75
Planet Healer
Homestuck 2? More like Homestuck POO amirite? Please bring back this forum
Posts: 324
Pronouns: he/him/his
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Post by NothingIsOkay75 on Oct 31, 2016 2:42:32 GMT
>Jake: Introduce yourself
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venchi
Rungjumpin' Ragamuffin
Posts: 283
Pronouns: he/him/his
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Post by venchi on Oct 31, 2016 14:54:23 GMT
Also google quintuplet
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tofurkinator
Nipper Cadet
hello and thanks for all the fish
Posts: 72
Pronouns: they/them/theirs
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Post by tofurkinator on Nov 1, 2016 1:23:56 GMT
>Jake: Introduce yourself Your name is JAKE LALONDE and you are OBJECTIVELY THE SMARTEST PERSON YOU KNOW. Other than your MOM, of course, but that's KIND OF A GIVEN--after all, she's a RELATIVELY WELL-KNOWN SCIENTIST and a PROFESSOR OF ASTROPHYSICS and she STILL FINDS TIME TO HOMESCHOOL YOU. Then again, said HOMESCHOOLING usually involves LEAVING YOU A BOOK OR TWO and MAYBE SOME WORKSHEETS outside her LAB for the day, along with a SEMI-ENCOURAGING NOTE. But ENOUGH OF THAT. Onto YOU.
You have many interests, and hahaha OF COURSE THEY AREN'T ALL THINGS RELATING TO SCIENCE WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT. SCIENCE is for NERDS. Which you AREN'T. Not a nerd, that is.
Your two BIGGEST PASSIONS are ANCIENT MYTHOLOGY and HISTORICAL DISASTERS, especially ones involving AIR VEHICLES OF SOME SORT. You HAVE A LIKING for OLD MOVIES as well, which is in fact HOW YOU MET YOUR FRIEND ROXY--on a FORUM DEDICATED TO THEM. You also DABBLE IN METEOROLOGY, and in fact are such an aficionado that you MAKE YOUR OWN WEATHER CHARTS FOR FUN SOMETIMES when your mom lets you use her TELESCOPE. You have QUITE A BIG EGO, though you do RECOGNIZE YOUR OWN FAULTS--namely that of BEING TOO GREAT for the WORLD to HANDLE.
You and your mom are PRETTY WELL OFF--In fact, the only things that you could EVER FATHOM WANTING are for your mom to stop turning the pages in the books so quickly when she's READING TO YOU, and for her to INSTALL A WINDOW IN YOUR ROOM ALREADY--It's HARD TO DO YOUR HOMEWORK when the only light is your CEILING LAMP. But THEN AGAIN, too much light has the potential to WRECK MANY, IF NOT ALL, of the seemingly-infinite EXPERIMENTS your mom is PERPETUALLY RUNNING UP AND DOWN THE HALLS and in ALL THE ROOMS of your HOUSE. You're BEGINNING TO THINK SHE HAS A PROBLEM REGARDING SAID EXPERIMENTS, actually--only LAST NIGHT you FOUND a MINIATURE TORNADO running in your BATHTUB. Though that might have also been a STRANGE ATTEMPT TO CONNECT WITH YOUR INTERESTS. There's REALLY NO TELLING WHEN IT COMES TO HER.
Your pesterchum handle is therapistsTerror and You're quite the intelligent gentlefowl, or so you like to think.Jake==> Google "tenacious" You google tenacious and are not at all surprised to find it MEANS EXACTLY WHAT YOU THINK IT MEANS. Hahahaha how could it ever possibly mean something else??? You hastily shove your phone in your pocket and look for something else to do.
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