|
Post by cealvan on Jul 7, 2017 21:04:43 GMT
Yes sir, but you are the one in charge of taking care of that, my job is to only respond to you
oh, ya, ok. how about this? Butler, where have all the staplers gone?
|
|
carcinodesFecit
Moppet of Destiny
1 4ɯ Ju5+ Y0ur N3160rh*0d 1d10+ Wh0 L0v35 H0ɯ35+uck!
Posts: 114
Pronouns: I'd rather not say
|
Post by carcinodesFecit on Jul 8, 2017 4:03:09 GMT
In the safe, sir. Anything else?
Anything, anything else... Ehem... I gonna have to get my manual. Grabs the manual from his desk and starts reading "How to Operate butler.exe" with glasses Looks away the manual BUTLER! Use your Lifey Powers on the plants, I think I accidently used my Doom Powers on it a while ago. Uhmm... is that how it works? Looks back at the manual Shit, I forgot how does this works...
|
|
|
Post by cealvan on Jul 8, 2017 4:10:58 GMT
first of all sir, I am a Linux program, therefore I'm Butler.Sh not .exe, secondly use Butler --help for help using Butler.
Butler, could you stack the water to look like a pyramid?
|
|
carcinodesFecit
Moppet of Destiny
1 4ɯ Ju5+ Y0ur N3160rh*0d 1d10+ Wh0 L0v35 H0ɯ35+uck!
Posts: 114
Pronouns: I'd rather not say
|
Post by carcinodesFecit on Jul 8, 2017 10:12:33 GMT
No sir, you can only stack GLASSES of water as water has no definite shape like solid does. It's all 6th grade science, sir. Oh and let's not forget the lie that all your science teacher teaches you! There are actually more than 7 states of matter and much more to come.
Butler that isn't what I asked for but thank you.
Are eggplants gay by the way?
|
|
|
Post by cealvan on Jul 8, 2017 23:59:49 GMT
in the words of some guy back in 2011, eggplants are #Tots Gay
Butler, could you fetch me my math thingy so i can do some maths?
|
|
venchi
Rungjumpin' Ragamuffin
Posts: 283
Pronouns: he/him/his
|
Post by venchi on Jul 9, 2017 4:43:19 GMT
You mean your calculator? Sorry Sir, but I had to use it to repair your giant transforming robot.
Butler I want you to spraypaint the completer works of Shakespeare on the outside of the mansion in bright pink.
|
|
carcinodesFecit
Moppet of Destiny
1 4ɯ Ju5+ Y0ur N3160rh*0d 1d10+ Wh0 L0v35 H0ɯ35+uck!
Posts: 114
Pronouns: I'd rather not say
|
Post by carcinodesFecit on Jul 9, 2017 11:24:15 GMT
But sir, I never studied about Shakespeare in school, sir. I simply can't do it with the ammount of knowledge I have about Shakespeare. I could however spray paint the complete works of Shakespear instead.
Butler! Are you gay? If so, do you want this Eggplant?
|
|
|
Post by cealvan on Jul 9, 2017 19:50:08 GMT
*stares at you awkwardly and then just turns and walks away.
Butler, how long until the bad poets blow up the earth to make a hyper expressway?
|
|
The One Guy
Rust Maid
Posts: 1,148
Pronouns: he/him/his
|
Post by The One Guy on Jul 10, 2017 15:46:39 GMT
I'm not sure, Sir, but the dolphins are still around, so we've got some time yet.
Butler, could you go check the ion stabilizers? I'm noticing irregularities in the plasma flow messing with the polarity of the core's energy flow.
|
|
|
Post by Wessolf27 on Jul 10, 2017 17:02:00 GMT
Sir, I think you're supposed to reverse the polarity of the stabilizers. That way you should be able to remove those irregularities. I suggest using your sonic screwdriver, Sir?
Butler, what is your opinion on the baby Dave meme?
|
|
carcinodesFecit
Moppet of Destiny
1 4ɯ Ju5+ Y0ur N3160rh*0d 1d10+ Wh0 L0v35 H0ɯ35+uck!
Posts: 114
Pronouns: I'd rather not say
|
Post by carcinodesFecit on Jul 11, 2017 7:16:08 GMT
The only thing I could actually say about it, sir, is that it isn't actually that far to what Strider would do as a baby.
Butler
What has 4 letters Something has 9 letters But never has 5 letters This isn't a question ;3
|
|
The One Guy
Rust Maid
Posts: 1,148
Pronouns: he/him/his
|
Post by The One Guy on Jul 11, 2017 15:48:22 GMT
Very true, Sir, but I wouldn't say "never" in that last line, as it can have 5 letters in other languages, or for that matter through typos.
Butler, bring me the good stuff.
|
|
|
Post by Wessolf27 on Jul 11, 2017 16:29:48 GMT
Sir, here it is as you asked for it, one giant bottle of absinthe.
Butler! *hic* Who are these fanciful green ladies? And why do they look so funny? *hic*
|
|
|
Post by cealvan on Jul 11, 2017 17:23:53 GMT
sir, I think it may be time to go home, you seem to have had a few too many beers.
Butler, why isn't this working?
|
|
The One Guy
Rust Maid
Posts: 1,148
Pronouns: he/him/his
|
Post by The One Guy on Jul 11, 2017 17:41:58 GMT
Sir, that's just a rock; I'm not sure what exactly you expect it to do.
Butler, I need you to- Butler, I need you to- Butler, I need you to- Butler, I need you to- Butler, I need you to- to- to- to- to- to- to- to- tooooooooooooooooo oo o o~*
|
|
|
Post by cealvan on Jul 11, 2017 19:41:24 GMT
Right away sir- right away sir- right away sir- right away sir- right away sir- sir- sir- sir- sir- sir-sir- sirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr~*
butter why did you just let me post this before I asked you to do anything, forcing me to edit this post, and leaving everyone to wonder why this is an edited post?
|
|
venchi
Rungjumpin' Ragamuffin
Posts: 283
Pronouns: he/him/his
|
Post by venchi on Jul 12, 2017 7:53:29 GMT
Because I thought it would be funny
Butler, where is the cake for my birthday?
|
|
The One Guy
Rust Maid
Posts: 1,148
Pronouns: he/him/his
|
Post by The One Guy on Jul 12, 2017 14:14:42 GMT
It has come alive and is attacking the kitchen staff, Sir, but don't worry, we'll have it subdued and ready to be eaten before the party starts.
Butler, I'm heading out on a business trip for a while; I assume you can take care of the mansion while I'm gone?
|
|
|
Post by cealvan on Jul 13, 2017 3:08:20 GMT
*you hear an explosion in the distance What mansion?
Butler, this thing that I'm watching on the tv definitely isn't a cartoon, and therefore has to be happening or have happened, should i be concerned about what's going on here?
|
|
venchi
Rungjumpin' Ragamuffin
Posts: 283
Pronouns: he/him/his
|
Post by venchi on Jul 13, 2017 7:12:44 GMT
No Sir even though it isn't a cartoon, Power Rangers isn't real.
Butler, from now on instead of paying you with money I'll be using dust bunnies as your salary.
|
|
The One Guy
Rust Maid
Posts: 1,148
Pronouns: he/him/his
|
Post by The One Guy on Jul 13, 2017 19:36:12 GMT
Certainly Sir, in that case, I'll be sure not to clean anything so you'll have plenty of dust bunnies to give me. In fact, I'm feeling so generous I'll be using some of my salary add to your meals!
Butler, why does our bottomless pit of doom now have safety railings around it?
|
|
|
Post by Wessolf27 on Jul 14, 2017 16:37:46 GMT
Because Sir, the last time you were there, you had accidentally pushed your grandmother into the pit. Poor Cassandra's still falling in her death.
Give me a massage, Butler and make it snappy!
|
|
carcinodesFecit
Moppet of Destiny
1 4ɯ Ju5+ Y0ur N3160rh*0d 1d10+ Wh0 L0v35 H0ɯ35+uck!
Posts: 114
Pronouns: I'd rather not say
|
Post by carcinodesFecit on Jul 15, 2017 4:17:44 GMT
Alright, sir, right away. Let the Master lie down on the Massaging table and immediately runs to the kitchen to get some live crabs. Then went to the master and dumps it all over the master. Exactly want you want, sir. A Snapful Massage.
Butler, want do you think of Fidget Spinners?
|
|
telaxius
corpse party
I don't want to go onto the cart!
Posts: 611
Pronouns: she/her/hers
|
Post by telaxius on Jul 15, 2017 5:22:44 GMT
With all due respect, sir, they are absolutely horrid. I have various precautions set in place if you ever decide to buy one. That is also why I am holding this shotgun, sir.
Butler, youuu are getting veeeerrry sleeeepyyyy.
|
|
|
Post by cealvan on Jul 16, 2017 1:34:05 GMT
Sir, plese don't do that (yawn) iiii'm driivi.....zzzzzzzzzz
Butler, what question should i ask you next?
|
|